I met this fantastic girl at a French embassy party chic, smart and sexy. We’re having the best time possible. You know what they say about old dogs and new tricks? It ain’t true
Then comes a phone call. “It’s MI6 we need to meet, it’s rather sensitive.”
We meet in the Red Lion. “It’s your girl-friend – she’s a spy for the CCP,” he says.
But she’s as French as French can be,” I said
“She is French but she was a student at Tsinghua University and we believe she was recruited by the Ministry of State Security while she was there. She certainly started working for it shortly after graduating,” said the MI6 guy.
“She told me she worked for France’s DGSE and was the daughter of the Comte de Beaune,” I replied.
“She tells people that,” said the MI6 guy, “the last Comte de Beaune died 300 years ago and she’s not that old.”
“What should I do?”
“Drop her fast,” says the MI6 guy.
I can’t, I love her, I think to myself. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me.
Next morning, after Cabinet, the PM sidles up. “Trouble with the girl-friend, Ed?”
“So they’ve told you,” I said.
“They tell me any stuff involving ministers and security,” says the PM.
“What should I do?” I ask him.
“Don’t tell her anything, don’t let her see anything, don’t take her anywhere she could pick up information,” says the PM.
“But keep her on?” I say hopefully.
“Absolutely,” says the PM, “have fun.”
“But what should I tell MI6?”
“Tell them you’ll feed her with any duff info they want the Chinese to swallow,” says the PM.
Greatly heartened, I phone her and ask her out to Annabel’s tonight.
I could feed her info about my startup companies which might get to the Chinese funds and pique their interest in investing.
Every cloud has a silver lining.
